hypocrisy

I hate hypocrisy and now i found myself drowning in it.

smiling when you're sad

grinning when you're upset

acting cool when you're mad

i cant believe i'm that capable of being a major hypocrite. I cant believe these tall walls - they're being so awfully mean. They dont just hurt me, they hurt other people. I dont like that.

I'm hating this.

and oh yeah, i just figured out something new about myself. I work myself to death if I'm angry. Abuse myself by not eating and will end up with having gastric.

I just love it when I end up being sick. It's like a way to punish myself for not being myself. (Okay. Now I'm officially being a masochist to other people and sadist to myself. It's like SM fetish. my goodness)

I'm recovering. While I'm at it, help me to recover.

This is it. Welcome to the road of recovery.

Go, Lebat. Find your rebound back and get back to Miss Cold.